One particularly regretful moment personally, was when my very young niece had to stay with my family while her mom (my cousin) was in hospital. This was more than 10 years ago and before I had kids. She was having a very tough time adjusting and cried throughout the night. Rather than playing any role in soothing her, I was instead more annoyed that she was ruining my sleep – because I had an important work meeting the next day. My mom cared for her that night.
Not something I’m proud of.
Having children opened my eyes to what’s most important in life. It has given me a sense of empathy that I would otherwise never have.
A Child Is “Illegitimate” If Born To Parents Who Are Not Legally Married
That’s why, I was quite surprised reading a recent Straits Times article drawing our attention to the fact that “under Singapore’s Legitimacy Act 1934, a child whose parents are not legally married to each other when the child is born is considered illegitimate”.
I get that the word illegitimate is used in a legal sense for a child born out of wedlock. But, as a parent, just thinking that a child born to a loving but unmarried mother would be termed “illegitimate” is quite heartbreaking.
Google the word “legitimate”, and you can see that synonyms include valid, acceptable and acknowledged. It made me wonder if the label of being illegitimate means the opposite of these things, then?
This label affects hundreds of unmarried mothers each year. From 2020 to 2024, there were an average of “about 745 live births per year to Singapore citizen mothers in Singapore”.
Unmarried Mothers Do Not Get Full Government Benefits For Having A Baby
New parents can usually look forward to a slew of government benefits when they have a baby. This includes subsidies for education, healthcare, childcare, infant care, the Migrant Domestic Worker Levy Concession and the Child Development Account (CDA). Mothers also get maternity benefits and childcare leave benefits.
While unmarried new mothers get many of the same benefits, they do not receive all of them.
Minister for Social and Family Development, Mr Masagos Zulkifli clarified this in a parliamentary response, stating that “the Working Mother’s Child Relief and Parenthood Tax Rebate benefits are intended to support parenthood within marriage. As such, they are not extended to single unwed parents”.
Looking at the IRAS website for the eligibility for the Parenthood Tax Rebate (PTR), it is explicitly stated that you have to be “married, divorced or widowed in the relevant year”.
Source: IRAS
Beyond this, an unmarried mother with her illegitimate baby also does not form a family nucleus for the purpose of buying an HDB flat under the Family Scheme.
Mr Masagos also stated that “majority of the Housing and Development Board’s (HDB’s) new flats are set aside for families, with priority for first-timer married couples and families with young children”. This means unmarried mothers may not have the same ability to provide a roof for their kids born out of wedlock.
It was nevertheless reassuring that he went on to say that “single unwed parents who require additional support may approach social service offices for financial assistance, and family service centres for holistic case management and socio-emotional support”.
Furthermore, “single unwed parents who require housing assistance can also approach HDB, which will assess each request holistically and exercise flexibility, where appropriate, to ensure that their children have a stable home to grow up in. For example, single unwed parents aged 21 and above may be allowed to buy up to a 3-room flat from HDB, or a resale flat. Those who cannot afford to buy a flat may be considered for public rental flats.”
Read Also: [2025 Edition] Complete Guide to Baby Grants in Singapore – Baby Bonus; CDA; MediSave & Tax Relief
A Case For Unmarried Mothers Needing More Support, Not Less
In Singapore, we have a “Made For Families” initiative, launched by the National Population and Talent Division in the Strategy Group, Prime Minister’s Office (PMO), to assure families in Singapore of support from the government and community at large.
Unmarried mothers and their child are one type of family – and they deserve all the support that are given to married mothers and their child. I’m not trying to create any new arguments here, but what’s really the difference between an unmarried mother at the point of birth, and a divorced mother of a young child, perhaps with an unsupportive partner?
My point is simply that the distinctions may be arbitrary – and simply punishes unmarried mothers who do not form the ideal Singaporean family core that the Government may prefer (perhaps even for good reasons).
In fact, it may be argued that an unmarried new mother may need even more support. For a start, they may already lack a financially and/or emotionally supportive partner in caring for a new baby.
Besides this, they may also choose to “legitimise” their child, and have to adopt them through a legal process. This will cost time, money and even create some personal anguish.
Case in point, the same Straits Times article referred to earlier also mentioned an unmarried mother expecting to spend about $6,000 to adopt their own child. Making this more complex, the illegitimate child cannot be adopted by both biological parents unless they are married. In such instances, if one parent adopts the child, the other parent would lose all legal rights he or she has over their child. One parent could lose visitation rights altogether, while the other parent may want to “legitimise” their child.
Another legal entanglement to consider is that illegitimate children are not included under the definition of “child” under the Intestate Succession Act. Thus, an illegitimate child will not be entitled to any share of his or her biological father’s inheritance if he does not have a will that names them.
Beyond that, an unmarried parent will also be treated similar to a person who wants to adopt a child they do not have any relationship to. Unmarried mothers have to get a favourable assessment evaluating her readiness and suitability to adopt a child – the same child she’s already caring for on a daily basis.
We all understand the logic that a married father and mother having a child is the best-case scenario for a family nucleus. But, it should not mean that unmarried mothers with a newborn should feel inferior or less capable to care for their own baby.
Ultimately, there is hope though. The Government has already proved that it is willing to evolve for the better of all Singaporeans. One example is that before 2017, unmarried mothers with a Singaporean Citizen child were only given 8 weeks of maternity leave. This was brought to parity with married mothers with Singaporean Citizen child in 2017 – giving them the full 16 weeks of maternity leave.
Read Also: Guide To Intestate Succession Act: What Happens To Your Estate When You Die Without A Will
